Not Publicly Insane
by muaaimoi
Summary: Did you know that anyone around you could be clinically insane but you would never know as long as they acted 'sane' . Lets see how a certain blonde shnobi does it ! Its just something different . Please read.
1. Chapter 1

OK I read **Bungle in the Jungle: A Harry Potter Adventure **which is one of my all time faves for like the third time and I realized Ive never tried writing in 2nd person before. Here's my crack at it. It Will _**ONLY**_ be continued if I get enough reviews !

I indefinitely dont own Naruto . I cant even pronounce the name of the dude that does.

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Not Publicly Insane

by:muaaimoi

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OK lets get some facts straight ! Your 8 years old and you probably have more reasons to drown yourself in sake than the average town drunk. Can you say fucked up much ? Yes. You can actually .In several very creative and imaginative ways that you have put much time and thought into . What else are you suppose to do when the only person that talks to you is that disturbingly phycotic voice in your head ?

Honestly its a miracle you still manage to put up a mask of sanity. It is also down right amazing that you live in a village of paranoid shinobi hell-bent on believing that your the reincarnation of a demon. More specifically the giant fox demon that massacred most of the village. Have you mentioned that they constantly have rather loud ' whispered ' conversations in which they constantly call you an demon and still think you dint know ? No you haven't, have you ?

But thats rather inconsequential . Especially when you consider that they are also perfectly happy thinking of you as the village fool. You also, by now ,feel rather inclined to comment on the fact that you also have many rather creative ways of saying ass-backwards. You were just blessed at birth weren't you ?

Well the old man that takes care of you seems to think so , doesn't he ? Oh did you say takes care of you ? Oh you meant sponsors you. Yep that's the one . What else can you call giving an 8 year old an apartment and monthly checks checking in only when he does some thing wrong ? See? Thats what you call sponsoring ! At least hes nice enough to hide the porn books he rather read instead of seeing you and helping you retain whatever left of your sanity . The ANBU that kill the more persistent villagers sometimes stop by too . But your not suppose to see them , now are you ?But really how are you suppose to miss all that killer intent that makes you feel like some ones gonna send a kunai through your throat any second ? Or the sudden shortage of creepy leers ? Honestly your not stupid !

Oh ! you just seem to keep on forgetting , dont you ? They think you are. Wait ...They're suppose to think you are . Isn't that why you go out of your way to act like an Idiot ? It is inst it ? They have to think so because if you show any signs of intelligence they'll take you out . And since no one else is about to look out for you you have to . You and that voice in you head agreed to that a long time ago. And as depressing as it is that you cant be a kid anymore, guess what ? Your gonna have to spend most of your life far to busy _pretending_ to be one. More specifically once again a loud mouthed hyper as hell idiot . Joy .

But hey it cant be that bad ,can it ? All you have to do is get use to torturing your beloved and useful as hell listening appendages by shouting_ everything_. And man do you have one hell of a set of lungs. Maybe a God somewhere saw you fortune and decided to lend you at least a little help . . . Naaah. More like Irony really really hates you for some thing you did in a past life. Maybe you were like a child molester of something ? You know the type that went to the park to spy on cute effeminate boys like you .It certainly would explain your image. What I mean with all that_bright _yellow blond hair , clear blue eyes and golden tan complexion? Everything about you is infuriatingly loud . And you really really hate it ,dont you ? Especially since you would like nothing better to do than melt into the shadows . But noooo its times like this that it is well established that Irony hates you.

But come on now stop bitching !You know that if you do that now that voice is just gonna out bitch you later . Like it always does. And you get enough from the people outside your mind scape thank you very much . Just grin and bear it . Its not like theres much else you can do now is there ? Man being Uzumaki Naruto son Of the Yondime Hokage , Jinchuuriki of Kyuubi No Yoko , and Konohas local village scape goat suck ! Man did your dad screw you over or what !

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	2. Chapter 2

I indefinitely dont own Naruto

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Not Publicly Insane

by:muaaimoi

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Ramen ,ramen,ramen, don't you have anything else in the house? Oh no that's right they don't sell you anything else do they? Well at least your sponsor has the decency to make sure they sell you _something._ Sometimes it really is like he almost cares_.Almost. _your feeling all sad again aren't you ? Come on now that wont do! Your a big boy now ,big boys don't cry! Besides you have your whole lifetime of pretending that nothings wrong . So why bother to show how you really feel now?

Besides you've gotten use to the hollow feeling that comes after the sadness haven't you ? Its almost like your a ramen bowl. You know the ones that you really hate because you just devoured its contents like you loved every minute of it ,when you just really want to cry because you need to go home after to lick something awful. Just to remind your taste buds that it really could be worse and that it can taste something that isn't _ramen._

Sometimes you wonder at the wisdom of pretending to like it. All it means is that when some one is nice enough to buy you something its _ramen. _And you still have to jump up and down and act all exited because you _love ramen. _Wait. No that's not right you hate ramen! you really really hate ramen .Because ramen is ramen and you always eat ramen and you always smile when you eat it and say its the best. So you hate it don't you ?Don't you ?

Maybe you really do love ramen . But then you wouldn't know would you ? You don't know what love is. But you know what you hate .Right ?.The only problem is that you don't really know how to hate anything voice in your head tells you it hates everything .Does that mean you hate everything too? Your sooo very your hungry too aren't you ?Yup. Your stomach just growled that means your hungry.

Your happy to have remembered something you do know. You don't like not knowing. Not that it matters. Your always pretending really it doesn't matter that you hate something or love it. Cuz in the end your just gonna pretend you do one or the go ahead and eat your ramen with a smile . Your very good at pretending. And so what if you feel sad . Its been a really long time since you've you've acted the way you felt long actually that you don't really remember how to act sad.

Oh well you'll have to look into that again .Because your pretty sure that you don't even remember how to that wont do will it? It wont do for you to pretend to cry if you don't remember how will it? But then again maybe you because that voice in your head just reminded you that if you ever start to cry you might never be able to stop.

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So what do you think ?


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